The Not Tonight Project
The Not Tonight Podcast
S1:E11 | From Performance to Permission: Cait
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S1:E11 | From Performance to Permission: Cait

Wife and mother to two young boys, Cait reflects how her youthful curiosity of romance and butterflies affected her perception of sex. Growing up, she spent a lot of time longing for the magical feelings she saw on TV shows and movies, thus influencing her deep desire for a romantic relationship.

As her relationship with her husband grew and changed over time, she watched the butterflies fade and they sunk into the predictable rut of married sex - doing it more out of obligation than from a motivation of desire. She deeply longed to get those feelings back, but felt stuck.

Cait shares how her perception of sex and intimacy changed over time, and how she discovered that what she needed more than any magical feeling was to give herself permission to show up in the sexual experience as none other than her truest self.

Resources Mentioned

Content Warning: This episode includes sexual content.

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Discussion about this podcast

The Not Tonight Project
The Not Tonight Podcast
The Not Tonight Podcast, hosted by Rachel Walker and Caitlin Nochajski, is a space for brave women to boldly share their stories of sexual transformation in marriage and long-term relationships.
Even if your partner is your best friend, do you sometimes feel stuck in your sex life? In this podcast, we hear from others about the raw, honest truth of long-term sexual relationships -why it's so common to feel disconnected, and what it take to build a sex life you love.
May these deeply authentic stories encourage and reassure you, because spoiler alert: when we tell the truth, we have better sex.